i hate feeling like this

my about me in facebook:

"hye. my name is nina farahana saleha bt ab. rahim and i'm invisible. not that i hv any super power, but i feel that way around ppl, even my frens. i dont connect well, i'm too serious nowadays, i shy away from attention(not reli frenly wit the camera) and i hardly laugh. ppl alwys thot me as sombong. now, i believe them. why? i dont know why.god knows. my apologies to all the ppl i hv acquainted for the past 18 yrs of my life.i reli need u ols to tego me first.i need ur help to break my bubble."

seriously, i hv a problem. if i tembung dgn any kwn or ex-classmates, i lg sng hati if i nyorok/took a diff route/buat mke as if xknal. its painful actly, for me to do that. i felt as if i hv a disease. urgh. i want to say hye. i want to go along well. but i dont know how. n i alwys felt left behind. i'm not self-pitying. i just gave up too soon. i had lots n lots of fren.. if i was just as friendly and rjin tego n amek berat, i wont hv lost them. i dont know wat i shud do. i'm just too shy. u might look at me, n say: kau? segan? haha.. but deep down in my heart, it aches terribly. i am segan gle. when i see sum1, my thoughts are: does polan still remember me? wud polan think i'm a big fat fool? wat do polan feels towards me? do polan even like being my fren?

i alwys say the wrong thing. i alwys made the lousiest joke.i nvr rmmbr birthdays. i hv nothing to share abt.i cn nvr show affection.i'm such a LOSER!

owh GOD, help me be a better fren..