i hate i hate! homesick kah ini?

i'm trying sooo hard to adapt to my new life and surroundings in bandung... but it's too hard.. all the things that had happened to me, i felt as if its a sign of i'm not supposed to be here. i feel sick in the pit of my stomach everyday..thinking that i do not belong. jealousy is another issue when i see that others are settling down rather well with their new found friends and roomies. last saturday, i caught a really bad fever, so bad that i can't even get up from bed. at that time, my family was still in bandung, but not near me. i can't tell them to come, i dont want to be a nuisance. and the clinic for the uni was really far, that i have to resort to using 'ojek' or motorbike to go to clinic. it felt as if my head was spinning out of control all the way to the clinic since the terrain was hilly.on the same day, i have to change room since my parents aren't really a fan of sharing rooms with people of different belief.capek dong! ughh. and then, my new roomie is as good as having none. gone out early,back in late. and i'm stuck alone in the room doing nothing,with no entertainment. thot that once here, i shud be going thru orientation of sum kind, but there was none. all we did(the dentistry students la..) was gone for registration, take a pic for student id, n that was it. others find sum joy in going out to town or jatos(nearby mall). but xlarat siottt..i cant be spending money everyday! i'm so afraid that i'll ran out of money, that i've only eaten rice 3-4 times since i got here and that is on 20th. and as sustenance, i ate instant noodles and instant food that my sis got for me. oh no, i've turn into a prude. demm. and how are my parents and sis doing in malaysia? jz got a msg saying that 'sian ktorg,nina xde xmkn nasi'.. wuuu.. berair da mate nih. who'll take care of my parents if i'm not there? my sis is going to leave soon too.. if it were up to my brothers..i dont even want to think what will happen to my mama and papa. oh dem,berair lg mate.hihi..da la. i need to stop. toughen up nina! u'll get thru this. hope for the best! amin! ok la..not all things here are bad. the hostel building is superb. jz like a service apartment. suerr! tp xde kipas..rse cm udara xgerak.nseb sejuk..hurmm.. k la. till then. mmuah3 to my family and frens, and pray for me k? i miss u guys badly..and i miss Malaysia too much. No country beats ur tanahair duds!